


so imma sing this song/anybody 듣고 있어?

by the_gaysian_agenda



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: :(((, And jeonghan has the long blond hair, Angst, Bullied!chan, Bullying, Canon Universe, Chan centric, Coming of Age, Growing Up, High School, Oh and chan has pink hair like oh my! Hair ish, Ok so chans in high school and like 17 or smth, Sadness, UGH HES SO CUTE, but its clap era, is tough, non-au, outsider’s perspective
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-10
Updated: 2018-08-10
Packaged: 2019-06-25 12:00:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15640329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_gaysian_agenda/pseuds/the_gaysian_agenda
Summary: Lee Chan is weird. Everybody knows that.He’s quiet and always looks tired and comes to school late and leaves early. He’s never at dances and he doesn’t have any friends.It’s the last week of school and there are rumors of special assembly.Chan’s the last person to be involved with that.





	so imma sing this song/anybody 듣고 있어?

**Author's Note:**

> i love chan thats why hes gotta hurt
> 
> bullied!chan ft. very self indulgent jeongcheol

Chan falls roughly against the row of lockers, hands scrambling and sketching over the grates with no avail. He hits the ground elbow-first with a solid grunt, pain shooting up to his shoulder.

“Where is it?!” Soo Jibeom kicks him lightly in the stomach with a pristine Nike sneaker. It doesn’t hurt enough to leave a new bruise, but he fell yesterday during practice. There’s no way to know if Jibeom knows that he already has a bruise there, but it stings regardless.

Chan’s very familiar with all six pairs of Soo Jibeom’s Nike sneakers, unfortunately. Today, it’s the yellow Air Forces.

Next to Jibeom, Park Jaehoon and Jang Minjoon snigger. Jang Minjoon rolls Chan’s head with the tip of one of his expensive Yeezys, nose-first into the floor.

_God, this is going to break me out,_ Chan thinks vacantly. He doesn’t have time to do a face mask for the next week. He has too much homework. And he has his own homework.

Chan feels the Yeezy lift off of his face, and he desparately cranes his neck for a breath of— _thank god—_ fresh, sneaker-less air. But he makes eye contact with Yoo Sooeun in his panic, who ducks her head down and keeps walking to class.

He doesn’t blame Sooeun.

“Chan-ny-ah, I thought we had a de-al!” Jibeom sing-songs, bending down a little. Chan lets his head fall back down onto the filthy tiles. _Nasty._ “Look at me. Channie.” Jibeom sounds stern, but there’s a joking sort of lilt to his voice, and Chan doesn’t have to look to know that Minjoon and Jaehoon are all probably giggling their asses off above him. Chan tries to turn his head to the other side— he’s suffocating in tile.

Jibeom leans down to grab his cheeks with one hand— the other probably has a vape pen or a half-eaten slice of pizza or a porn magazine or something nasty like that in it. Chan jerks instinctively, trying to get away from his grasp, but Jibeom tightens his hold and forces Chan to contort his neck and twist up at him.

Chan can already feel his neck cramping. It’s going to be sore later.

Jibeom giggles. “There you go. Now, where did you hide it? We aren’t going to check up your ass, you know. We aren’t your little mom and daddy.” Minjoon snorts, and Chan gets a nice whiff of garlic breath. He loves Korea.

“I— Jibeom I swear I—“ Jibeom slaps his cheek, shoving Chan’s nose back into the floor. “Jibeom seonbae-nim! I swear I don’t have your English homework! I didn’t have time to do it!” Chan coughs into the ground, choking on his own spit. But Jibeom’s hand just tightens, until Chan is seeing spots and sure that his gravestone will read _choked on his own tongue and spit, what a dumbass._

“Channie Channie Channie, you gotta do a little better than that. I’m trying to work with you here! But you gotta—“ Jibeom looks over at Jaehoon, who kicks him in the hip, _hard— “_ deliver on your end! Okay?” Chan jerks and tries to flip over, but the hands holding him in place stay firm. Minjoon crouches down and slaps him in the stomach as a little parting gift. “So have it by next period and we’ll be good, okay? You know where to find us.” Jibeom finally lets go of Chan’s face, and the world clears up again as he hacks for breath. Jibeom cuffs him up the chin and Chan can’t really bring himself to care as his head snaps back against the lockers behind him. The world spins and the hallway blinks a few more times, and Chan drags himself into a somewhat upright position.

The hallways are emptying and he watches as a group of girl passes by, sparing glances at him. Yoo Sooeun stares openly at him, looking a little repulsed and a little sorry (which he doesn’t blame her for, not in the slightest), whispering quickly to Yoon Somi as they pass.

_Ugh_. He still has three periods left until school is over for the day, and now an extra assignment. He had to get help for his own English homework, how is he supposed to do Jibeoms?

—

Yoo Sooeun is late. For Chemistry. With Mr. Kang. Who is awful and infamously picky with time management.

He’s going to skin her alive.

Sooeun rushes down the hallway, and she only has one more staircase until—

_Ugh._

Sooeun runs into something and falls roughly onto the floor. It’s a good thing that she’s wearing pants today, and not a skirt, because she goes sliding backwards against the tiles.

She just hopes she doesn’t get floorburn.

“God, watch where you’re—“ Sooeun, blinking the spots out of her vision, looks up at whatever— _whoever—_ she just ran into. And stops.

_Fuck._

The man, or boy, or teenaged, overly-muscled manling, pulls his hand away from his forehead, shifting his weight on his broad shoulders. He looks young, but too old (and non-pubescent) to be a student and Sooeun’s _sure_ she would’ve remembered seeing him on campus. But there’s no way he’s a teacher, not looking like that. Maybe a sibling?

“I’m so sorry, are you okay?” He looks at her through long eyelashes. Sooeun can see his biceps and— _oh god, his pecs—_ through his thin black t-shirt as he picks himself up off the floor. He offers a hand, and _she can see the veins in his forearms._ “Miss?” He asks again.

_Right._ Sooeun is still on the floor, probably looking like a total mess. She limply takes the _specimens_ hand and lets him pull her off the floor.

“Uh, sorry, I gotta— Chem— I have to— class.” She stumbles lamely, heaving her bag back onto her shoulder. Mr. Gorgeous just smiles at her through his lashes as she stutters her way down the hall.

Forget Chemistry, she thinks dazedly, walking into the wrong stairwell.

—

Sooeun walks into the second floor girl’s bathroom and decides that _whatever is going on right now, she wants in._

There’s a cluster of girls— not her best friends, but she knows them— standing by the sinks, all whispering and giggling to each other. She latches onto Somi’s  shoulder— they sit next to each other in English, so they’re friends. Or something.

“What happened?” Sooeun asks the group.

“Oh my god, so there was like a van outside school at lunch, right?’ Somi giggles, bouncing up and down. “And you know how everyone just thought they were like maintenance or something? Or like, pest control?”

Sooeun nods. She hadn’t thought that it was that weird, either.

“Okay so, like, turns out there’s a special assembly at the end of the day— Soo Jibeom didn’t even ditch today!” Cho Aerin giggles, rapid-tapping on the glass of her phone.

“Wait really? Like, Soo Jibeom on the soccer team?” Sooeun’s heard of him— all the juniors know him. Jibeom’s crazy hot, super charismatic, _and_ he’s a total bad boy, ditching and smoking and skipping classes to make out with girls or whatever people like him do.

“Damn, it must be good then. Like, not Smokey the Bear, get me?” Lee Miyoo glances up from her own phone, quirking up a corner of her mouth through her wine-red lipstick. Sooeun wouldn’t be lying if she said she were a bit intimidated by Lee Miyoo.

“Uh, speaking of Soo Jibeom, the craziest thing happened to me today.” Somi waves her manicured hands in the air, almost hitting Sooeun in the face. “Oops, sorry, not used to acrylics, you know?” Somi giggles. ”Okay, so, I had to go to the bathroom during third period, right? So me and Jihye and Aerin and Heejin went together, and so I was waiting for them outside their rooms and then Jibeom was there— he was vaping or something, I don’t know, but it was hot— and he winked at me!” Somi lets out a big breath, face flushed. Miyoo whoops, hitting Somi in the arm across Sooeun.

“Ew, he’s cute but he’s the biggest fuckboy, I swear.” Mina scrunches her nose.

“No wait, guys, this is super important, like the assembly, right?” Aerin grabs Miyoo’s shoulder. “Ok so I heard from Sora who said she talked to Heejun and Doyoon, who heard from Hyemin that there are like, a ton of really hot guys on campus right now, and they’re doing something for assembly.”    

_That would explain the weird meeting earlier,_ Sooeun thinks.

“Y’all are gonna shoot your shot or what?” Miyoo drawls, blinking slowly. Or batting her eyelashes. Or something. Sooeun can’t tell, everything Lee Miyoo does sort of has an _atmosphere,_ like times slowed down in a sort of rosy haze.

“Miyooie!” Jin Woorin laughs and hangs off of Miyoo’s shoulders. “You’re so direct!”

Sooeun starts to tune out. She doesn’t really talk to these girls that much, but lunch is almost over. It would be a waste of time to try to find her friends. And she doesn’t want to walk around school alone, hot guys or not.

“Okay so everyone better be on campus for assembly, you get me?” Mina says, and the bell rings. Thank god, Sooeun can only take being the ultra-outsider for so long.

“Sooeunnie, we have English, right?” Somi locks arms with her, starting to head out of the bathroom. Sooeun nods.

“With Mr. Ji.”

“Ugh, ew. Did you do the homework—“ There’s a sudden crash, something (or someone) against metal. Sooeun tightens their arms together, searching the hallway ahead. It’s almost classtime and the halls are starting to empty. Somi tugs on her arm, pointing to a three boys standing in a little triangle around a locker a bit ahead of them. “There— isn’t that Soo Jibeom? And like, co.?”

But Sooeun looks for a little longer, and it’s not just three people— it’s four, with some unfortunate person caught in the middle of whatever little cult thing is going on with them.

“Wait, Somi, isn’t someone in there?” Sooeun cranes her neck a little. “Shit, isn’t that Lee Chen or whatever?”

“Lee Chan?” Somi takes a few steps closer. “Holy— damn, he is not gonna have a fun time. What do you think he did?” They get a little closer, just in time to see Lee Chan get kicked in the hip. Sooeun winces.

In high school, or even from elementary school onwards, you get judged based on how you look and how you walk and how you talk. And in a school like theirs, where everyone’s known everyone since third grade, if you mess up when people are even just starting to get on with the hierarchy thing, you’ve messed up _bad_. So people like Lee Chan, who are kind of quiet and don’t have a lot of friends, never go to any parties or anything like that, who are ghosts outside of school and at recess, have it rough. It’s just the way it works, Soomin thinks.

Lee Chan is a bit of a weirder case, though. He’s always been quiet, for as long as Sooeun can remember, and she doesn’t think she’s ever really had a full conversation with him. No one’s ever seen him outside of school and he’s never been at a dance or even fifth grade bingo night. He leaves right after school ends and never stays for any clubs or activities— Sooeun pities his college applications. He doesn’t take any extra credit classes, never has a fitting uniform, always has eyebags so big she would’ve thought they were just part of his face, comes to school late and more often than not, limps in the hallways. Aside from passing periods, Sooeun doesn’t think she’s seen him in the cafeteria or doing anything at recess. She’s not sure if he even has friends, like, at all. No one talks to him, and he doesn’t talk to anyone. Except, she guesses, Soo Jibeom, if that counts.

Weirdly, and it’s kind of a shame, Lee Chan is actually _really hot_. Like, most people are put off by his general weirdness, but Sooeun would argue that he’s just as good-looking as Soo Jibeom. If not more, face-wise. (That Lee Chan dyes his hair a different color more times than Sooeun changes nail polishes, and manages to pull them off, is also pretty hot.) Soo Jibeom has a impressive body going for him, but she’s pretty sure that Chan is pretty decent looking neck-down, probably just normal sort-of-skinny teenage boy. She can’t really tell, not from his baggy uniform. But a lot of people lately are into that, she guesses. It’s kind of a waste of a nice face, to be on a guy like that.

“—until school ends, why even bother?” Sooeun starts, pulling her eyes away from Chan on the floor, snapping her head over to Somi.

“Sorry, what? I totally spaced.” Sooeun glances back at Soo Jibeom And Friends, and in a moment of the worst possible luck, makes _eye contact_ with Lee Chan. Poor guy. But she isn’t about to get involved with whatever’s happening over there. They’re all a good head, _at least_ , taller than her.

“Ok so like, Lee Chan’s kinda… _off,_ but like, we have a week until school ends for the summer, so why even bother beating him up?” Somi glances back at them as Sooeun and Somi pass.

”Ugh, I have no clue. I guess they really are brawn over brain.” Sooeun snorts as they turn the corner. Whatever. It’s not like it’s her business, anyways.

—

Sooeun is just trying to sneak to the vending machines. She _just_ wants chips. That’s _all._

So why is she stuck here, hiding, crouched next to a dumpster in the back parking lot of the school?

Today is just. All over the place, in every bad direction.

Sooeun risks another glance out.    

_He’s still there._

Gorgeous Hallway Man from earlier has been standing in front of the vending machines for a good five minutes now. What is he _doing?_ It’s a shitty high school vending machine in a parking lot— maybe he can’t read the three different chips’ names through the graffiti?

She pokes her head out a little more.

He’s on his phone— his fingers are skirting across the screen, probably texting or sexting or whatever people with faces like that do.

Suddenly, he slides his phone into his pocket and turns. Sooeun draws back against the dumpster for a heartbeat. (She can feel her pulse in her legs. She just hopes he can’t hear it.)

A figure, tall and slim with shoulder-length blond hair, jogs up to him, face mostly covered by a white air mask. Sooeun can’t tell if their male or female— their hair is perfectly shiny and long, but she can make out a faint adam’s apple and they don’t appear to have any… curves or assets.

Blond hands something to Hallway, maybe a wallet? Hallway nods, smiling— and there’s no other way to describe it, not that Sooeun can think of— sweetly at the newcomer.

_They must be close._ Sooeun squashes a spark of jealousy down. That’s ridiculous, she’s a high schooler, and she’s pretty sure Hallway Boy is older than that. Which is illegal.

Hallway punches something into the vending machine and Mask moves to insert a— _holy fuck—_ fifty-thousand won bill into the machine. Mask reaches up to collect their receipt, and there, _right in front of Sooeun,_ Hallway steps a little closer and wraps his arms around Mask’s waist, a hand brushing the hair away from their face. Mask turns their head to the side, saying something Sooeun can’t make out, and Sooeun can only watch as Hallways head dips down onto Masks neck.

Oh god. Sooeun feels like a creepy voyeur now. She just wanted chips. But she can’t stop watching. She’s seen too much— she’ll just be more curious later.

Hallways fingers skirt higher, and he gently tugs the mask off of the blond’s ears, crumpling it in his hand. Revealing Masks face.

_Oh god._

If Sooeun thought Hallway were hot, or handsome, Mask is… _gorgeous._ Beautiful. Strong and delicate at the same time.

Without the mask, Sooeun has a clear view of Mask’s features, of their high, delicate nose bridge, the flawless arc of their cupid’s bow, of their soft eyes and as they open their mouth to speak, of their perfect teeth.

But she doesn’t see Mask’s face for long, because Mask turns in Hallway Boys arms and is quickly pressed against the vending machine, hands running over Hallway Boys jaw and in his hair as the two kiss.

_Chips are not worth this_. Sooeun leaves while they’re busy, feeling both like a criminal voyeur and like she’s in on a secret.

—

English passes (and Lee Chan, pink hair sticking halfway up, comes in halfway through, limping to his seat in the front of the classroom, and falls asleep. Sooeun sort of wonders if he’s dead.) And so do the next two periods, until it’s last period.

Sooeun’s just sitting down in World History when the announcement comes—

“ _Students, please congregate in the Auditorium!”_ Principal Kim’s voice blares grainily over the ancient PA. _Well, there it is,_ Sooeun blearily thinks. _Moment of truth._

Honestly, she’s mostly glad that she doesn’t have to go to history today.

Sooeun slides out of her chair, dumping her pencil case and water bottle back into her backpack. Even if the assembly ends before dismissal, there’s no way she’s going back to class.

—

The room is dark.

Blue lights.

They flash once. Twice.

The music starts up— a guitar.

Drums pound through the crowd.

The lights raise on the stage— figures, arranged in a triangle, clapping.

(Sooeun tries to count— there are too many. Fifteen? Twelve?)

From her seat, she can see their faces clearly— _fuck, the guy in the very front is_ fine, someone whispers. Her eyes catch on the smirk on his lips, the tongue running over his lips, his silver hair, and dark eyebrows.

_It’s Hallway Boy._

Figures.

Sooeun can only watch, transfixed, as his perfect lips open and _fuck._

He _growls._

Someone grabs her shoulder tightly, jumping up and down. She thinks it might be Somi. She can’t bring herself to check. Sooeun distantly wonders how Somi would react if she told her about what she saw by the vending machines.

They move— all of them, all twelve or fifteen or twenty. Down. Up. Side to side, clapping in perfect sync. The front switches, moving so quickly that she hardly notices that Hallway Boy isn’t leading anymore. They switch again and again. She can’t look away from him.

But they part, suddenly, waves on a shore, the red sea. And another boy takes the lead, pulling forward from the front. Sooeun looks over at smoothed back pink hair and—

Somi shakes her arm, _hard._ The people around her— the entire audience— watches and whispers— _is that—? No way. Isn’t he—?_

But Sooeun looks again, looks at his eyes, looks at the way he’s smiling and dancing. There’s something she’s never seen on his face, something _stronger_ in the glint of his eyes, something in his easy smile as his voice, vibrating through the auditorium floors into her ribs, seems to come natural as breathing, something in the way he’s moving like he were molded from a divine Creator’s hands to be on stage.

And as soon as he came, he’s gone, disappearing into the crowd of perfect fantasies.

Sooeun looks again, at whoever’s leading now, and there’s something a little, dare she say, _harsher_ in hallway boy’s face. But she can’t look away.

—

“Holy fuck, what the hell was that.” Heejin, a seat behind Sooeun, says what they’re all thinking as the lights come back on.

“That was— that was Lee Chan, right?” Mina’s mouth gapes at the stage.

“Fuck.” Miyoo exhales. “What the fuck.”

The boys onstage line up and _wow,_ there are a lot of them.

(Sooeun tries again— this time, she counts twelve. She counts again and gets eleven. There’s no use.)

(Sooeun might be miscounting, but there is no way that there are seventeen of them. Not in hell.)

They stick their hands out— Sooeun has yet to see one make a non-choreographed out-of-total-sync movement yet.

“ _Say the name, Seventeen!. Hello, we are Seventeen!”_ They bow together, all at the same flawless ninety-degree angle.

The Hallway Boy steps forward, adjusting his in-ear with one hand. Sooeun can see his veins from her seat. It’s like slow, perfect, torture.

(But she remembers vending machines and masks)

“Hi everybody, I’m Seventeen’s leader, Choi Seungcheol. You already know our maknae, right?” He smiles at the crowd, showing off perfect teeth and perfect gums. The school cheers. _Yay, hot men._

Sooeun was all over it at first, but if he does one more _perfect_ thing she might run onstage and throttle him.

“Actually, we decided together that we’d come and perform at our Channie’s school, in honor of his graduation, right before we start our world tour. So thank you for treating him well and we hope you enjoyed our small performance!” He steps back, taking the hands of the two next to him— Mask, she recognizes the long blond hair, and a sort of western-looking boy (who, of course, is also completely gorgeous). Hallways smile is blindingly bright, but Sooeun looks hard at his eyes— they’re dark, hard. She wonders if he knows about Chan.

The school watches as they file offstage, taking the back door to who-knows where. Sooeun watches Lee Chan, Mask, and Hallway Boy leave with a sort of ache in her throat.

Lee Chan doesn’t come to school the next day.

Or the next.

Or after that.

(Sooeun knows. She’s heard that Soo Jibeom was looking for him, right up to graduation.)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!!!! Let me know if you’d be interested in a sort of similar type fic but instead svt transfers into chan’s school 
> 
> (Ps LEE CHAN I LOVE YOU i just... yannow,,, angst)  
> (ugh his pink hair like the kind of brushed back one that he has right now is so superior fight me)


End file.
